Friday, April 06, 2007
Sad day for psychology...
 I've just read this news and I thought most of you might not have heard the news yet, since it happened only a few time ago. Personally, I am sad because this great specialists in our field, Paul Watzlawick, like so many others are going away, at the same time I am concerned with the carrying out of their legacy, because it is in our hands: day after day we should remember our precious duty!
This is my way of paying respects to his family, his friends, his colleagues and all our "psychological society".
Paul Watzlawick, psychology theorist STANFORD PROFESSOR IN BEHAVIORAL SCIENCES Associated Press Article Launched: 04/05/2007 01:39:04 AM PDT Paul Watzlawick, a pioneering Stanford University family therapist and communications theorist who believed people create their own suffering in the very act of trying to fix their emotional problems, has died. He was 85. Mr. Watzlawick died Saturday of a heart attack at his home in Palo Alto, according to colleagues. Born in Austria, Mr. Watzlawick gained fame for parting with Freudian psychoanalysis in favor of an approach to therapy that emphasized relationships over introspection. He trained at the C.G. Jung Institute in Zurich, Switzerland, and in 1960 joined the staff of the Mental Research Institute in Palo Alto. As a scholar and a practicing therapist, Mr. Watzlawick wrote 22 books translated into 80 languages for both academic and general audiences. Emotional health, he believed, hinged on abandoning the ego and achieving well-being through effective communication with others. In popular books like "The Situation is Hopeless, but not Serious" and "Ultra-Solutions: How to Fail Most Successfully," Mr. Watzlawick playfully promotes his theory that the worst way to find happiness is to actively seek it. Mr. Watzlawick's research into the processes and principles of communication formed the foundation of the outward-looking therapeutic approach he developed with his Mental Research Institute colleagues, known as MRI Brief Therapy. Mr. Watzlawick became a licensed psychologist in 1969. He stopped seeing patients in 1998. In 1967, he became a member of the clinical faculty in the department of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Stanford University Medical Center and was clinical professor emeritus at the time of his death. He retired from the Mental Research Institute in late 2006. Mr. Watzlawick donated his body to science and requested that no services be held. Labels: death, family, relationships, Watzlawick
Monday, March 26, 2007
The world is but one country
Iran and the rest of the world are in constant dispute... But, amazingly the Associated Press just published a text that starts this way: " The Christian concepts of heaven and hell originate in Iran. The Jewish holy Talmud is littered with Iranian words and ideas. And some Iranians cherish the Israeli city of Haifa as a sacred place". Another sentence you can find in the same text is: " Concepts such as the survival of a person's soul after death, the Day of Judgment, heaven and hell, and holy angels all derive from Iran's surviving Zoroastrian faith, a 3,000-year-old religion that predates Islam and Christianity" Attention: this is not a glorification of the History of Persia, or Iran, or anything else. It is just one of the many things that show us, humans, that our bonds are stronger than we think, that our reality is one, that our world is so strangely interconnected that we cannot deny our co-existence. This is a way of reminding that the Earth is, indeed, one country and humankind its citizen!Labels: human nature, relationships, religion, self-knowledge, world citizenship, world unity
Thursday, March 08, 2007
A bird named Mankind
“The world of humanity is possessed of two wings: the male and the female. So long as these two wings are not equivalent in strength, the bird will not fly” (‘Abdu'l-Baha, The Promulgation of Universal Peace).
Woman’s emancipation and the total equality between genders, is essential for humans progress and the transformation of society. Inequality slows not only the advancement of woman, but the whole progress of all human species. And, worse, our insistence in amputate the rights of more than a half of the world’s population is not only an insulte to the dignity of our species but a cancer that destroys us from inside, leaving unbearable sequels in our familiar, social and universal tissue. And, even worse, still today, in some parts of the world, women are seen as fragile and, therefore, inferiors. Diverse cultures from yesterday and today have an approach on this issue and we, human, haven’t still understood that they all say the same! Notice that according to Hinduism (religion with manifold millennia of existence!), human population depends of the chastity and fidelity of women and, just like children they could “be unleaded, women have similarly the propensity to degradation. This is why women, just like children, need constant protection of the family” (A. C. Prabhupáda). Krishna Himself speaks of men saying they could occupy themselves with “prejudicial and horrible works destined to destroy the world” (Bhagavat-Gita), but He doesn’t say that of women … At the Jewish-Christian Theology, woman is that one who has conceded “the right of redemption by the glorification of Mary’s virginity” (Carr, A., 1997), having her origin at the “the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man” (Génesis, II:22). And, of course, we could not approach this subject without talking about the Islamic World. In Iran, for instance, a country that, unfortunately as so many others, women lack basic and simple human rights (even though we can feel some progresses), it aroused a young poet, Táhirih, that “marked [her] century (…) with heroic transcendence” Conjugated beauty, wisdom and eloquence such, that attracted multitudes of men and women, inclusively awaking the interest of the Shah of Persia himself. Abandoning the use of the veil, despite the millenary costume of her motherland (…) and partaking hot debates on mystical and spiritual themes, accumulated victories after victories against the male exponents and best representatives of the thought of her age”. It was exactly because of that that the Government arrested her, lapidated her on the streets, exiled her city to city: because she defended, feverously, the rights of her sisters, women. Finally, she was sentenced to death and, according to the testimonies of that age, she was incisive: You can kill me as soon as you like, but you cannot stop the emancipation of women!” (Araújo, W., 1994). Táhirih’s inspiration came from the Bahá’í teachings that so bravely embraced. “The Lord, peerless is He, hath made woman and man to abide with each other in the closest companionship, and to be even as a single soul” (‘Abdu’l-Bahá in Selections from the Writings). Appearing that we are encouraged to go back to that one un-sexual being, from whom the rib was taken. It is also said that “the education of girls is even more important than that of boys, for in time these girls will become mothers, and, as mothers, they will be the first teachers of the next generation” (Esslemont, J.; 1975). Showing itself adapted to the requisites of our times, we can also find on their writings: “According to the spirit of this age, women must advance and fulfill their mission in all departments of life, becoming equal to men. They must be on the same level as men and enjoy equal rights. This is my earnest prayer” (‘Abdu’l-Bahá, The Compilation of Compilations, Vol. II).
Labels: 'Abdu'l-Bahá, family, human nature, relationships, sex, world citizenship, world unity
Thursday, February 22, 2007
St. Valentine, frustration and meaning
I’ve just read, on Europe Press, that the seeing all those hearts on the shops, all that publicity on TV with lovers offering gifts to each others, and all those movies with love and romance abounding during St. Valentine Season, can provoke some anguish and frustration to those who want to have partners but, simply, don’t.
At least that’s what Leonor Casalins said. She said that “all this stimulation offered day after day” could lead to a bigger desire and need of having a partner, “frustrating” those who don’t have but want. According to her, “there is a need to share life with someone e some moment” and “most people need a partner”, among other “biological needs”. This reminds me, once more, of Viktor Frankl, who once said: By his love, the loving person enables the beloved person to actualize these potentialities. By making him aware of the what he can be and of what he should become, he makes these potentialities come true. This is a fact: by loving we allow ourselves to show our potentialities. And, usually people is unaware of that. We know that love is good, and relationships amazing, but we just don’t know why. And we keep searching and searching for this true love to come, to make ourselves more complete, more unique, more humans. Like Majnun searching for Layli everywhere: It is related that one day they came upon Majnun sifting the dust, and his tears flowing down. They said, “What doest thou?” He said, “I seek for Layli.” They cried, “Alas for thee! Layli is of pure spirit, and thou seekest her in the dust!” He said, “I seek her everywhere; haply somewhere I shall find her.” Baha'u'llah, The Seven Valleys, p. 6. Maybe we should be aware our Layli could be everywhere. But should we be looking for her everywhere? I don’t recall reading Majnun ever finding her, just like the poem from Saná’í: Never the covetous heart shall come to the stealer of hearts,
Never the shrouded soul unite with beauty's rose. Frankl explains us that by searching pleasure by itself we shall end up frustrating both the will of pleasure and the will of meaning. Furthermore he adds that pleasure should be the secondary effect of our meaningful actions. Only this way, the “covetous heart” can progress to a degree where it shall attain the hearts, and the “shrouded soul” “unite with beauty's rose”. Labels: Bahá'u'lláh, couples, emotions, Frankl, love, relationships
Friday, February 16, 2007
Arrive at Rome, pass through her, think of her...
 Arriving at Rome and passing through her, anyone’s life could change. Having been in Italy, before, in the North, I am amazed with the difference and the beauty that Rome so proudly exhibits. And I am not even talking about that pride in being pretty, but about that one pride that can lead an entire civilization to such a decline that converts it in the tale of the world. Lets look at history: what happened to the Macedonia of Alexander (the Great!!!)?, where is the Mongolia of Genghis Khan?, where did the Egypt of Ramses loose itself?, in which atrocious situation we can find the Persia of Cyrus, of Koorosh or of Darius?
The arrogance of the lords of power leads always to a fall, with the consequent difficulty in getting up. It is said, in physics, that all that goes up has to go down. I should disagree! We can rise and progresses, piano a piano, we can even toddle, walk, and even run, and go lontano. But we do not need to consider ourselves the holders of divine and absolute knowledge!
The extreme organization of Milan and the extreme chaos of Rome…
The taciturn monotony of the fashion city versus the joyful life of the capital of the Empire …
In Rome, people is capable to love and hate, simultaneously. They step on each other (literally) to get into a bus, they offend to demonstrate anger, they mock the unknown at the same time they appreciate differences.
The Rome of the Empire is today the lost Rome, the Rome in search of si stessa, looking for her place in the world. Fluctuant between lefts and rights as almost every European capitals, Rome symbolizes the world civilization, incapable in conceiving her origins in a past that melts cultures (how much of the Roman Apostolic Christianism, for instance, isn’t resulted from the Mithraism Zoroastrianism?), that looses herself in a present of high diplomats and sages at the same time that underestimates herself as the tale of Europe, struggling to go back being who she was not knowing who she is … ROME, ROMA, the first letter of ROMANCE! ROME, city of Christianity. ROME, cradle of the old order. When shall you wake up, rise and strive to become the City you were once?  The city that can held the bridge towards new world order, where worldly dichotomies between nationals and foreigners, between northern independentists and southern nationalists, between poverty and wealth, between religious exclusivity and the impetus of integration nullify themselves and your citizens are converted in the heralds of a new world order?
 When will your paúra be converted in an active force? Let it be Let deeds, not words, be your adorning, oh sweet and long-missed Rome! Labels: feelings, human nature, leadership, love, relationships, religion, travel, world citizenship, world unity
Monday, January 22, 2007
Who let the dogs in?
A few years ago, the song Who let the dogs out was a top hit in manifold nations of the world. Amazingly, it wasn't called who let the cat out... That is because it seems that we think more of dogs that of cats. On the movies The Blue Bird, the dog was always trustworthy and the cat was all for jealousy and envy.  We eat hot dogs and we sing " The hounds of winter". How many foods are named after a cat, and how many movies dedicated to them? I can't remember of many. That is probably because dogs are our best friends!!! Deborah Wells (Queen's University) explained, in the British Journal of Health Psychology, that dog owners appear to suffer from fewer minor ailments as well as fewer serious medical problems, having lower blood pressure and cholesterol levels (perhaps due to regular walks with their pet-buddies). I had a friend that could tell you that dogs are also good to call girls' attention. According to Dr. Wells, "The ownership of a dog can also (...) facilitate the development of social contacts, which may enhance physiological and psychological human health in a more indirect manner". Other studies show that the presence of a dog can help chronically ill children endure potentially painful medical procedures, being able to sniff out malignant melanomas or the onset of low blood sugar in diabetics. In Israel, nation of the four great religions and the forecommer of many scientific discoveries, was also suggested that pets can help people with schizophrenia to feel calmer and more motivated. In other words, if you want a pet: dogs are the ones! Labels: animals, movies, pets, relationships
Friday, January 12, 2007
Making love, making speeches
I have just read an interesting article named “Make love, very healthy to your work life”, based on Stuart Brody's study, recently published in the New Scientist. Several people were monitored to check how can sex influence stress levels. And, he found out that those people participating as volunteers in the investigation, practicing observed sex presented lower stress-related blood pressure and performed better on public speeches. You could think that whoever makes sex in public is able to make anything in public, but, according to Brody, this is because some cranial nerve is controlling some of our psychological processes, releasing oxytocin, the hormone that works out during sexual act, and that has a calming effect! Now, remember what Frankl could say about this: sex shouldn’t become the means to a good speech, but the reason to start giving yourself to others. Making love could be, just like giving speeches, a experiential value that allows you to connect with another human, a human that, just like you, is able to give and to receive! Labels: emotions, fear, Frankl, human nature, love, reasons, relationships, sex
Monday, January 08, 2007
Twofold life (2 of 3)
Only through reflecting, and the positioning between those two extremities, will there be forward steps in the relationship. Better said, why speak of relationships when we can talk about meeting? It is by meeting the other that I see who I am, that I see how I act, how I think, and react. It is through this communication (that in Latin could mean “put in common”) that commitment appears (“sending myself to the other”).  And how do two lives become one, one twofold life? Some great thinkers affirm that the human being is a giving being. That means, the same way it is the nature of the fountain to outpour water, showing itself alive and transmitting life, it is the nature of the human being to endow himself incessantly – endow his richness, endow his time, his energy, his values, his support and his love to all those surrounding him. Nevertheless, it needs preparation; a firm and conscious effort of self-knowledge and knowledge of the other. It is this way that, once more, we come to the meeting. It is in this meeting that the “I” and the “You” transcend to a monadic “We” in which the human being becomes able to overcome his limits. Knowing the other means knowing myself; because I reflect myself on the other, as a shadow that manifests itself only when there is a light to shine.
And this light might well be Love! A love that should not be blind, but, once again, conscious! And the problem comes when love, which is born blind, wants to remain blind– or better – when we insist to remain blind, afraid of knowing the real character of the other, the companion we have idealized, afraid that knowing we no longer want him/her; afraid of being abandoned; afraid of solitude: afraid! Sam Cyrous (published in Psicologia Actual, Portugal, March 2006).
Labels: communication, couples, fear, human nature, love, relationships, self-knowledge, transcendence

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